


Sketches

by Snowfall



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-10-21
Updated: 2012-09-09
Packaged: 2017-10-24 20:11:07
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 20,082
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/267398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snowfall/pseuds/Snowfall
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>COMPLETE--Inuyasha happens upon a sketchbook not meant for his eyes and finds the truth of Kagome's feelings for him, which throws the untrusting hanyou into a world of confusion.  This is a het romance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Discoveries

~*~

 

**Chapter One**

**_Discovery_ **

_(This story was originally posted under my former pen name, Hanyou Slave. This is the first beta’d version and a minor amount of description has been added to smooth out the flow. There have been no changes to the story itself)}_

 

_'Doesn't she know what tonight is? Why isn't she back yet? I guess I'm going to have to go get her.’_

Stars shone brightly in the moonless sky, bathing the landscape in an eerie glow while a black-haired figure in red clothing slipped over the mouth of the bone eater's well. He emerged into the darkness of a small wooden building on the other side of the time portal, five hundred years into the future. He looked up to a window, her window, his door.

_'Good, the light's still on. She's awake. How do I get up there now? What's this? A rope ladder?'_

But it wasn't rope at all. Vines, braided and supple, hung from the black iron railing of her balcony.

_'It looks like she made this herself! And just for me,'_ Inuyasha thought with a small lopsided grin.

Hand over hand he climbed until he reached the rooftop. He stood on the balcony, dark brown, almost black, eyes peering into the small room. To the right, a desk lamp lit the room. Kagome, dressed in lavender pajamas with pink teddy bears, was slumped over the desk, her raven locks draping down her back and over her arms. She was asleep.

_'Damn. She's asleep already. She'd be really mad if I just picked her up and took her back. Guess I'll just stay here for the night,'_ Inuyasha thought with a mental, _‘humph’._

Inuyasha quietly slid the window open and lightly stepped inside. Looking to her bed on the left, he wondered why she had fallen asleep at the desk. Still gazing at the comfortable bed covered with a pale blue blanket, a pink ruffled skirt hiding the bed rails, Inuyasha found himself becoming annoyed, or perhaps it was something else that he had never been willing to admit.

_'Well, she won't be good for much if she sits like that all night.'_

At least, that was his reasoning for deciding to lift her to her bed. He slid his left arm between the surface of the desk and her chest, wrapping it around her back. Kagome's head and arms hung limp as he lifted her. He scooped her legs up with his other arm. Without opening her eyes, Kagome wrapped her arms around his neck, nuzzled her face into his chest and whispered, "Inuyasha," then sighed.

_'She is still asleep and she's saying my name!'_ Inuyasha leaned over to lay her down, but she squeezed his neck, moaning, and wouldn't let go. _'She always smells so good. If I ever told her, though, she would tease me all the time.'_

He had to kneel down to get her onto the bed. Trying not to wake her, he continued to lie across her until her arms slid down from his neck. He was in no hurry to separate himself from her soft cheek and the lavender scent of her ‘shampoo,’ as she called it. But, once he felt her grip loosen, he pulled away and placed her arms around her rib cage, taking a few moments to gaze at the fair skin and crimson lips. She sighed and turned toward the wall, the movement making her pajama shirt rise just enough for a little skin to show. Inuyasha wanted to touch her. Instead, he pulled the blanket out from under her causing her bottoms to slide down a bit.

_'Damn, this is getting ridiculous,'_ he thought, feeling his cheeks flush and warmth invade the pit of his stomach.

Quickly, he pulled the blanket over her and walked to the desk, intending to turn off the light. On the desk sat a stack of artist's sketch pads.

_'What are these?_ ’ he wondered. _‘Mmm. I wonder if she would mind?'_

Inuyasha sat down and looked through the stack. Each pad was labeled by date. He started with the oldest first. Her sketches were okay, but she must have been very young then. There were portraits of her family, together and individually. She graduated from number two pencils to black chalk and, later, began using colored chalk and colored pencils. With each sketch pad, her art became better. There were sections with her cat Buyo and other animals, a collection of plants, flowers, and trees, and a collection of inanimate objects. She must have been trying to stretch her abilities.

Coming upon the last two notebooks, he studied detailed portraits of their friends in his era, all done in painstaking detail. Her shading and proportions were perfect. Against one of the demons they had fought, Sango had the fire of a demon slayer in her eyes, wielding hiraikotsu from high in the air on a flying Kirara. Miroku was sketched sucking a demon into his wind tunnel with his monks robe billowing out behind him, brows furrowed. Shippou was throwing a ball of foxfire. He had to smile at the portrait of himself, striking with a flaming Tetsusaiga, a smirk on his face. There was even a sketch showing Miroku with his hand on Sango's bottom, a crimson handprint on his face.

Inuyasha chuckled. _'Such detail and so well done. Where did she find time to do all this?'_

Inuyasha continued to browse. Kagome began sketching individual portraits capturing the softer side of each of them. He came to his own portrait.

_'Is this what I really look like? I don't look at her that way do I?'_

His face was scowling, mean, and angry. As though he were about to eat her. "I'm sorry, Kagome," he sighed. He gasped in shock at the portraits of his transformation, something that he had no way of observing

_'How could she stay with me after seeing that? How could any of them? Are they plain stupid?'_ he wondered, deeply concerned and confused. He turned to gaze at the brave girl who freely trusted him to come into her window unannounced.

Kagome stirred and moaned. He wished he could smell her scent, know what she was dreaming. But, he was human tonight, not hanyou.

Continuing, the portraits of him became greater in number, capturing the different sides of him. He especially liked the ones of himself fighting demons. Then he came to one that broke his heart. Him…holding Kikyou. He closed his eyes, feeling the pain that Kagome must have felt. He went on.

_'She noticed that?,'_ he thought, when he saw the pictures of him sitting in a tree under a full moon, standing on the edge of a cliff in the setting sun with his head down in grief, sitting on the ground, after he had just slaughtered a bunch of bandits; he had been mourning. Then, his face as he had stared down at her while she slept.

There were only a few pages left. He decided that there was no reason not to finish. His eyes widened, seeing a collage of himself naked from the waist up bathing, washing his hair, stroking blood and dirt from his ears with wet hands, scrubbing his arms. He was even more shocked when he turned the page. There were sketches of her in the water with him, bathing him as he had done on the previous page. There was one difference, an addition; they had their arms wrapped around each other in a passionate kiss.

_'Is this what she wants? She couldn't, not after everything she has seen.'_ He studied the way in which she portrayed herself. _'She is much more beautiful than this sketch.'_

His breath caught. The rest of the sketches floored him. He was completely nude; stretched out on a boulder, standing and holding a flaming Tetsusaiga, leaning against a tree with a cocky look on his face. The full frontals were embarrassing. And last, them together, both nude, embracing each other, sleeping in each other's arms, kissing, making love, and tender moments.

He closed the last pad. Sitting there, he stared at it, unable to think. His chest was pounding, his mind blank, only aware of his own heartbeat. Finally, his mind came back to him. He lifted himself from the chair, a bit stiff from sitting so long, and turned to study the girl he now saw as a young woman.

_'Could she really want me? Even after everything I did to push her away? Everything I did to hide my feelings for her?'_ he thought, hoping.

_'Only one way to find out.'_

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

***Disclaimer***   
_Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru._

 

~*~


	2. Dreams & Wishes

~*~

 

 **Chapter Two**

 ** _Dreams & Wishes_**

 

 _‘I don’t know how much he remembers after his human transformation, but maybe, just maybe, being alone will give him time to reflect on our relationship and he will remember it tomorrow. I don’t like leaving him alone when he is vulnerable, but it’s not like he’s carrying the shards around with him attracting demons. Besides, Sango and Miroku are with him. He should be alright,’_ Kagome comforted herself.

“I know he will be alright!” she firmly decided.

Chocolate brown eyes studied the last sketch. In the upper right-hand corner, the magical being that was both human and youkai, Inuyasha, was embracing her with his eyes closed, passionately kissing her while she stroked his ears. In the lower left-hand corner, human Inuyasha cupped her face and gazed into her eyes while she leaned into his hand, her hand on his.

 _‘Stop dreaming, Kagome. It will never happen. He’s too much in love with that old girlfriend of his, Kikyou. He doesn’t love you; he loves her,’_ she reminded herself.

Kagome sighed and closed the sketchpad, rubbing her hand over the cover, gazing at it with longing. Sad and forlorn, she laid her head over the stack of drawings. A single tear escaped from the corner of her eye, landing on the sleeve of her pajamas. It was late. No moon brightened the night sky. Soon she was asleep, left to the dreams that either left her comforted or lost in pain. Perhaps tonight she would have good dreams.

It was late and, soon she was asleep, left to the dreams that either left her comforted or lost in pain. Perhaps tonight she would have good dreams. She could hope, couldn’t she?

Somewhere within the spiraling blur that led to her imaginary world, she felt his arms around her, carrying her.

 _‘If it were only real,’_ she thought to herself in the twilight of beginning dreams. _‘At least, I have this.’_

In what she thought to be a dream, she wrapped her arms around Inuyasha’s neck, taking in his silver hair, burying her face in his chest. When he tried to pull away, a small bit of annoyance invaded her perfect moment.

 _‘That would be just like him. But, I’m not going to let him go. It’s my dream and he will stay right where he is.’_

Inuyasha’s warm embrace was the last thing that she felt before velvet darkness soothed her weary mind.

 

~*~

 

 _‘Do I really want to do this? Can I be faithful to her? Kikyou still haunts me, still claims my soul. Do I have to allow her to take me with her? I belong to her in death, but what about in life?’_

Steeling his resolve, Inuyasha made his decision. Why should he give up those things that life had to offer before death actually claimed him?

 _‘I should be able to live while I’m alive. Kikyou cannot make time stand still, after all.’_

He had never forgotten Kikyou’s question. It had puzzled him. Why would making time stand still encourage him to hold her forever? It was something that he had never understood and he wasn’t sure whether or not he really wanted to know the meaning behind her words. She was the past. Kagome was his future. Of this he was certain. At least, at this very moment.

Inuyasha turned off the desk lamp. Streaks of the silvery starlight streaming through the window sent shimmers of radiant color threading through Kagome’s hair. A cool breeze brushed Inuyasha's face as he stared down at her, watching her breathe while he attempted to gather his courage. He could have gazed at her peaceful visage all night, simply to watch her breathe. Even with her delicate features, she could be quite fearsome, and this was a rare moment in time that might not ever be regained. His plans for the night could turn against him, leaving him subdued beneath her flaming ire.

 _'Will she accept me? Or, will she act like Sango? I will never know unless I try,'_ he worried.

Hesitantly and haltingly, with much doubt and trepidation, Inuyasha slowly removed his red attire, leaving only the white, thigh-length, long-sleeved shirt.

 _'I can't just crawl into her bed completely naked. That would be assuming too much too soon.'_

Quietly, while holding his breath, Inuyasha slid under the blanket. Facing Kagome's back, he avoided touching her, though his hands itched to caress her smooth soft skin. Lavender scent washed over his face, helping to relax his tense muscles. He allowed himself to sink comfortably into the soft mattress, pausing for a brief moment to reconsider his decision. Gently, he picked up a lock of her hair and, while closing his eyes, held it beneath his nose. Her hair radiated the scent that he found so soothing. So soft beneath his fingers, the silky, raven strands moved him to comb her it away from her neck and shoulder.

There was no reason to turn back now. If there was anything that he was not, it was a coward.

 _'Such beautiful, pale, porcelain skin.'_

Inuyasha trailed his now sensitive, human fingertip over the soft skin at the nape of Kagome's neck. He just could not resist the feel of it. Drawing closer, he touched her with his nose, and then rested his cheek against her warmth. Still, she did not move. Inuyasha became more courageous, moving closer and spooning his body against hers. This time she wriggled, adjusting herself to his shape and pressing herself against the mold of his body.

He lay there for awhile, nuzzling her thin neck. The humid, summer warmth, combined with their body heat, became increasingly uncomfortable. She must have become as uncomfortable as Inuyasha because she began kicking until the blanket and sheet were tossed over him. He simply shoved it off into the floor while staring at her petite figure.

Her waist was so small compared to his large hands. _‘I could probably fit my whole hanyou hand around that tiny waist,’_ he thought, putting his hand under her shirt and gently stroking her waist and ribs.

In the past, he had never dared such intimacy. So many obstacles had stood in their way. Even now, their circumstances hadn’t changed, except for one thing. He was now privy to her innermost thoughts. That could be seen as a breach of trust. If that were the case, he had to have faith in Kagome’s forgiving nature.

Turning his mind from his doubts, his hand traveled underneath her pajama bottoms to her hip where he squeezed, then continued down the side of her supple leg, feeling the silky skin beneath his battle worn hands. Heat began to rise from his chest and seep through his whole body, seemingly to the very bones. She was so soft, so delicate.

 _‘Will she wake and want this as much as I do? Or, am I stealing this pleasure from her, an unwanted thief?’_

Inuyasha slid his left arm under Kagome’s neck and around under her arm. His right arm came up across her abdomen, resting his hand between her breasts. He pulled her to him tightly, not willing to give up this feeling of contentment. Home. This was home.

~*~

Kagome drifted upward from the depths of slumber to the twilight that exists between dreams and waking.

 _‘I wonder. Does his embrace feel this good in reality? I won’t give up this dream.’_

She refused to let go of the dream, clutching his right hand in hers and pulling it tighter to her chest. His arm was soft against hers, unlike the hard muscles that she had imagined.

 _‘Okay. Now there’s something I hadn’t thought of dreaming yet! ’_ she thought, startled at the feeling something long, stiff and hard against her back.

Her consciousness moved toward lucidity and she began to realize that this was definitely not a dream.

 _‘Who would do such a thing! Inuyasha would never…’_

Jumping away from Inuyasha, she backed herself into the wall. “Inuyasha! What are you doing?!”

Dreams were one thing, reality quite another. This reality caught her completely of guard.

“I...I’m sorry, Kagome. I’ll leave if you want me to,” Inuyasha stammered, recoiling and looking as if he’d just been bitten. This was new territory. Killing a monster was easy enough. Those skills were the exact opposite of catching a woman who he desired above all else.

Inuyasha immediately slid from the bed. Kagome could see from the expression on his face, that he felt rejected. He looked so alone, so sad. Heartbroken.

 _‘How could this stubborn jerk suddenly change? Oh. That’s right! He’s human tonight and his emotions tend to be more prevalent. His softer side is definitely more pronounced,’_ Kagome internally mourned. _‘He hates that.’_

About that time, she finally noticed his state of dress. _‘He’s naked?! Oh, not quite. Whew!’_

“Inuyasha, please come and sit...” she began to say, “on the bed.”

Wham!

“Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to do that! Please, I’m sorry,” she pleaded.

 _‘Damn those beads of subjugation,’_ Inuyasha cursed under his breath. “It’s okay, Kagome. They don’t work as well when I’m human,” he muttered, dejectedly beginning to dress.

“Won’t you come and talk to me, Inuyasha?” She did not want to lose this chance, this opportunity so precious, and neither did he. His memory may be clouded when he reverted to his hanyou form, but it would be there nonetheless. _‘His memory may be clouded when he reverts to his hanyou form, but it will be there nonetheless.’_

Unable to lift his head to look into her eyes, he stepped forward and sat down beside her. He had stolen from her, had made the wrong assumptions, or, so he thought.

Kagome reached out and pulled his face up to hers. “Look at me, Inuyasha.”

“I can’t. I...took what wasn’t mine to take.”

“No, you didn’t.”

Not quite knowing what she meant, but hoping, he hesitantly looked into her eyes with a longing that he was unaware that he possessed. He nearly died of relief when she quickly answered his confusion, planting her lips softly on his.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

 **Disclaimer**  
 _Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~


	3. Passion's Promise

~*~

 

 **Chapter 3**

 ** _Passion’s Promise_**

 

 _‘Her lips are so soft.’_ Inuyasha closed his eyes and returned her tender kiss.

Silence. Only the sensation of her lips against his. A moment, unnoticed, lost to the passage of time.

The black-haired Inuyasha blindly brought his hands up to gently rest his fingers on Kagome’s cheeks. He tenderly lifted her face with the palms of his hands. Her skin was so soft and warm. Her taste and scent put him at ease in a way he’d never known possible. If he could have, he would have wrapped her around his body and soul like a thick warm blanket.

She parted her lips, moving deeper into their kiss. Her breath quickened and warmth rushed to her face. She felt Inuyasha slide fingers upward to comb through long black her hair. His touch sent tingling heat racing through her body. The sensation increased ten fold when he took hold of her head and gently pulled her closer. His tongue teased the soft wet inner fold of her lips. She was entranced by the smooth texture that slid along her tongue and around her teeth. The gentle caresses inside her mouth had warmth pooling in her stomach and prompted her to engage him more fully. She slid her hands up the front of his Kimono to clutch his chest. A burning heat that seemed to suck the breath from her rose between them. She vaguely wondered if this was having the same effect on him.

 _‘She doesn’t understand what this could mean,’_ Inuyasha worried as his feelings intensified. He tried to suppress his growing desire. He slid his hands down to her shoulders and gently pushed her away then touched his forehead to hers.

“Kagome?” He waited for a response.

 _’Has he changed his mind? I don’t think I could handle that,’_ thought Kagome and her chest tightened at the distinct possibility.

“Yes, Inuyasha?” She gazed into his charcoal eyes darkened by the night.

“What about tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that?”

His heart ached hoping this was not just because he was human. He did not want to face rejection once he returned to his hanyou form. Her sketches of his transformation played through his mind. He knew that the sketches of his angered face showed his efforts to keep her distant from him, despite the desire in his hanyou heart. But, did she know that? Did she know that nothing could change his love for her?

“What do you mean?” she asked, not wanting to scare him away with her hope that they would always be together. At this moment, he had the power to break her, perhaps to the point of no hope for recovery.

“Kagome…” he sighed, struggling to say the right words. He had never been good with words. Ineptitude could cost him everything. It took everything he had to put voice his need. Rejection would kill him. “I can’t do this if it is only for one night or only for the times when I am human. Do you understand what I am saying?”

He studied her face, trying to glean something from her reaction. Her eyes showed some hesitation. _‘Is she afraid?’_

“Inuyasha, do you mean that this is forever?”

“Yes.” He stared intensely into her eyes, attempting to impress upon her the significance of what he was trying to convey.

“We don’t have to if it’s not what you want.” She would never push him into something he didn’t want and this was so strange and new. It was as though he had made a leap that she could never have imagined possible for her the gruff outcast who had barely accepted any form of intimacy. As was her habit when she was nervous, Kagome fidgeted with her fingers, staring down at her hands.

“I want to, but do you?” His right hand gently came down over her fidgeting fingers.

“But will you want to…after you return to your other form?” She knew that Inuyasha was more open and sensitive while in his human form. Having him love her like this now was wonderful, but what she considered his true form, wasn’t quite as soft.

“Yes, and you haven’t answered my question,” he reminded her.

“I have wanted to for longer than you could imagine,” admitted Kagome with a heartfelt sigh.

 _‘If anything could cause her to back down, it has to be the visions of my demon side. Even I don’t know if I should subject her to that now that I have seen her sketches,’_ Inuyasha thought then realized that he had to at least ask her.

“You can live the rest of your life dealing with the hanyou that could transform and kill you?” he asked, anxiously awaiting her answer.

“Yes. Haven’t I already proven that to you?” she asked, a bit surprised that he hadn’t already come to that realization. “Do you love me, Inuyasha? I can’t do this either if you don’t love me.” That was the real question. What would be the purpose of spilling her heart and soul into him if he would only reject her later? She loved him with all her heart and knew that if he didn’t feel the same, they would end up ruining their relationship.

Inuyasha reached up with his right hand and lightly traced his finger around the curve of her ear and down her jaw with such a look of longing that it caused a lump to rise in Kagome’s throat. “I told you. I will always be by your side, Inuyasha,” she assured him.

“For some time now, I just...” Pain crossed his face as he lowered his head. Admitting such things was so difficult. He was certain that he could have never done so while in his hanyou form. Opening himself up to her like this risked everything that he was, especially his half-blooded side. Regardless of what anyone thought, it was that side that needed the most emotional protection. “I didn’t want to be vulnerable again.”

“Oh, Inuyasha. I could never hurt you like that. You have to realize that,” said Kagome while caressing his cheek.

“But you leave me all the time,” muttered Inuyasha and leaning his face into her hand.

“I always come back, don’t I?”

He nodded his head and pressed her hand to his face with his. _‘No matter how much I had tried to drive her away, no matter how much I have hurt her, she has always stayed by my side.’_

“I found something, something you lost,” Kagome said, standing up and walking to her dresser. _‘This may help to reassure him that I will not go back on my word.’_

She opened her top dresser drawer and wrapped her hand around an object. Padding back to him, she hid the object in her right hand. She climbed up on the bed and tucked her legs to the side.

“Come here,” she whispered.

Inuyasha slid up to sit in front of her and crossed his legs while wondering what she was doing.

Still clutching the object in her hands, she leaned forward and reached for the string of beads around his neck. “You won’t be needing these tonight,” she whispered in his ear, the breath from her lips causing his entire body to quiver.

She lifted the beads from around his neck and slid them down his long black mane Inuyasha closed his eyes and took a jagged breath, finally feeling the freedom that he was afraid would leave her open to his attacks. Tonight though, she wouldn’t be in any danger. One night of freedom. Sitting back, she took his left hand and tucked an object into it. Inuyasha looked down after she pulled her hand away.

He gasped, his breath hitching in his throat. “Where did you find it?”

“I guess it fell off the last time you were here.”

After looking at the necklace with awe, a rare smile graced Inuyasha’s features. “I looked everywhere.”

Kagome grinned at his admission. It was a relief and a pleasure to know that he was attached to the necklace that she had given him. What she did not know was that Inuyasha had come to believe that the necklace truly was magical, as she had insisted when she had first given it to him. After all, it was what had saved him during Kaguya’s attack. It had been Kagome’s object from the future that Kaguya hadn’t been able to manipulate.

It was magic. Her magic. He knew it as he untangled the string and handed the ends to Kagome. She didn’t hesitate to tie it around his neck. A gold heart pendant now hung in the hollow of his throat, the inside containing pictures of both. Though the metal should have been cool, it sat warm against his skin. It was a comforting weight and brought along with it the thought that as long as he had the necklace, Kagome would always be with him. With his heart in his throat, Inuyasha unfolded his legs and hesitantly leaned forward, lips slightly parted.

At first, Kagome wasn’t sure of his intent. Once it dawned on her that Inuyasha was offering a kiss, she felt her cheeks warm while butterflies flitted all through her belly. Inuyasha wrapped his right arm around her back and pulled her forward as he folded his lips around hers. They held each other in a tight embrace, afraid to let go and at the same time yearning to crawl inside each others’ skin and become one.

Inuyasha gently leaned into to her, pushing her back onto the bed. Their bodies melted together as he let his weight sink into her. _‘This is a dream,’_ he thought while he gazed at the person that comprised his whole universe.

Inuyasha’s gaze was too much for Kagome. Even in the relative darkness, his charcoal eyes glowed with such determined intensity that the world melted away, leaving only him. The desire to touch something so incredible overwhelmed Kagome and she pulled his shoulders down and ravaged his lips then plunged her tongue deep into his mouth. By his own choice, he was hers now. She had rights to his body, to explore every corner of his mouth, to sip from his lips. She had waited for this, waited for so long that her elation was nearly painful.

At her aggressive behavior, heat rose within Inuyasha. Joining her in her fury to be one, he wrestled his tongue with hers, stroking ever corner and wall of her mouth, drinking her sweet nectar. There was no battle, no struggle. They simply lost themselves in the taste, smell, and sensation of finally touching in one of the most intimate fashions, finally giving in to all the pent up longing.

Kagome felt her body flush, felt his arousal against her mound. She could not help but raise her hips and to seek to satiate the desire between her thighs. She rocked his body above her as he moved forward and back. The sensation of him rocking against her and pressing his hardness in just the right spot made her so hot that her head spun with the intensity of the burn.

Breathing hard, Inuyasha rose and began to unbutton Kagome’s pajama shirt. Sliding his hands up under the shirt, he parted the fabric and caressed her warm silky skin.

“You’re so beautiful, Kagome,” whispered Inuyasha while gazing at the woman beneath him.

Kagome smiled at him, glancing at the heart pendant dangling from his neck. He had pretended to reject the necklace, so she had been a bit miffed when she had discovered its glow as he had battled with Kaguya. Had he not been wearing it, the battle would have been over before it began. Now, her gift was not hidden under his clothing, but hanging above her in clear view, a tangible sign that he loved her. And maybe, just maybe, she felt as though it was a visible sign that he publicly accepted her. Leaving on display would give her a sense of comfort, security, and surprisingly, pride and a sense of possession, and of being possessed.

With her pajama shirt now peeled back, Inuyasha caressed her body beginning at her belly and working his way up to her breasts, lightly cupping them, and then brushing his fingers over her nipples. Up close, her fragility scared him, even while her inner strength increased his own power.

Kagome felt her desire growing, heat radiating throughout her body as she quivered beneath him.

“Are you okay? I’m not hurting you am I?” asked Inuyasha unsure that her trembling was from pleasure or pain.

“No, no, you’re not hurting me. Don’t stop,” rasped Kagome, surprised at her own boldness.

He leaned down, gazing at the stiff hardened nipples, longing for his touch heretofore forbidden fruit. Leaning down, his dark hair brushing Kagome’s sides and arms, he tenderly kissed each nipple then brushed his cheeks against them, tenderly making love to them, to her.

“Inuyasha...” Kagome moaned for no reason that her fuzzy mind could justify. What he was doing felt so wonderful that she couldn’t help herself.

Inuyasha looked up to see her head tilted back, eyes glazed over, lips parted, and face blushed a deep crimson. The thought that she could respond to him so freely sent blood rushing through his veins. Sliding up, brushing his shirt against her nipples, he trailed feather light kisses up her neck, behind her ear, coming back down to nibble on its lobe. Moving back down and wetting her neck, he trailed up the other side, following her jaw line to her chin and then licking and suckling up her chin to her soft succulent lips. He fell into her sweet mouth as he rocked his hard member against her mound. All of those denied emotions rose to the surface rushed to the surface with a strength that overwhelmed his heart. They pushed him forward, urging to take the one he had so long thought was beyond his reach.

Her hips answered of their own accord as though her body was beyond her control, her belly sinking seemingly to her backbone. Kagome’s moans reverberated through Inuyasha’s body as his lips captured the muffled sounds returning them.

Inuyasha lifted her up and helped her out of the pajama shirt, then pulled the bottoms off. He stared at her lower body out of curiosity and in wonder. Kagome could wait no more.

She longed to feel Inuyasha’s heated skin against hers and so, leaned forward and undid his sash. Inuyasha pulled his kimono and shirt over his head, discarding them on the floor. Kagome hesitantly, somewhat embarrassed, slowly slid his pants down. What she saw was amazing, and scary. She lightly touched his swollen member exploring this part of him that she had never seen. It was smooth like satin and seemed to pulse beneath her fingers. Clear viscous liquid seeped from the tip. Curious, she touched it, smeared it around the head of his shaft then tasted with the tip of her tongue. It tasted of salt, not at all unpleasant.

Inuyasha closed his eyes letting out a restrained groan through clenched jaws. He felt her arms around his hips, pulling him into her, his member pressed against her cheek. She nuzzled his belly and turned her head to feel his thick hardness against her nose. Inuyasha’s stomach lurched when he felt wet warmth caress the side of his shaft.

The quiver and upward flex of his member told Kagome that this pleased him. Pulling back, she wrapped the fingers of both her hands around him and tenderly licked the tip. Inuyasha mewled when she wrapped her lips around him and swirled her tongue. Ever so slowly, she pulled her lips away and used them to caress the tip of his engorged shaft.

Inuyasha could barely stand it. He felt as though his abdomen was folding in upon itself, tightening like a drawn bow as his excitement reached a new level. He thought his pleasure could not be more heightened without release until Kagome slid her hot wet mouth down his shaft. It was sheer torture, but blissful torture.

“Kagome...please…don’t stop,” rasped Inuyasha between jagged breaths.

Kagome grinned, loving that she gave him so much pleasure. She wanted to give him more. While making love to him with her mouth, she developed a slow rhythm gripping him with her hands as she moved up and down his shaft, taking him deeper into her moist confines with each stroke and working the muscles of her throat. The taste of the salty nectar that seeped from the head of his shaft prompted her own juices to flow between her thighs. Giving him this pleasure, feeling his responses, only heightened hers.

Inuyasha panted moaning a barely audible, “No more,” pushing her back and hovering over her.

He slid down to nip and tug at her nipples and then to ravish them with his tongue and heated mouth. Inuyasha felt her body arch while he savored the effects of his teasing. His body was lifted with the rocking of her hips. Were he hanyou, he would be able to smell the scent of her arousal. That would come later, tomorrow, if he was lucky. Beginning at her breastbone, he lapped and kissed a searing trail down her supple skin as he gripped her ribs between his strong hands.

Kagome squirmed, taking jagged breaths and quivering. To the point of pain her body ached for him; her heart crying for him to make love to her. Inuyasha pulled his hands down to place them between her thighs.

“I want you, Inuyasha. Now, please,” she panted.

“Soon,” he whispered with patient tenderness.

Inuyasha lay down between her legs, his head above her thighs and slowly began to explore her moist wetness with the tips of his fingers. He rubbed his thumb and fingers together, feeling the slickness of her nectar. Lifting them to his lips, he tasted her.

 _‘Clean like spring water,’_ he thought to himself.

Lowering his head, he gently explored her soft wet petals with his tongue. That tight tension seeped through her belly and spread out through her through her limbs. The gentle touches sent streams of heat that caused an ache to swell inside her. That aching and heat burned through her flesh until her core was on the verge of pain, and she instinctively knew that Inuyasha was the cure. Without conscious thought, her legs opened to him and invited him to relieve her.

Inuyasha took advantage, delving deeper with his tongue only to find that her quakes, accompanied by quiet mewls, made his blood roil to the surface of his swollen skin. The hardness of his arousal was all but killing him. He opened his mouth to pull her petals and bud into his mouth. Caressing and stroking with his tongue, first slowly and then with passion, his own body tensed in pleasure at Kagome’s writhing.

“Inuyasha, please,” Kagome pleaded.

Inuyasha could not deny himself, or Kagome, any longer. He pulled himself above her and gazed into her deep chocolate eyes. Could she do this without regret?

Kagome could barely keep her eyes open, but managed a smile and then gasped when Inuyasha bore his weight heavily upon her. Their bodies rocked together in passionate preparation for what was to come. Slick fluid coated Inuyasha’s swollen member.

“Kagome, I don’t want to hurt you, but I can’t help it.” His pained expression clearly stated his feelings of guilt. Smiling, though she was a bit scared, she tried to comfort him.

“I know, Inuyasha. It’s okay. No pain, no gain, right?” she re-assured him, even through her own fear.

Inuyasha simply gazed at her for a moment. What could he say that would really make it easier? Nothing. He pulled back to allow the tip of his shaft to slide down and rest just outside the entrance of pleasures promise, a gift that he was about to take from Kagome. She moaned as he gently tested her heated slick entrance, yet she still seemed to pull away as he barely entered and bore down against her barrier. She grasped his hips and dug her nails in trying to accept the pain that she was about to receive.

Inuyasha pulled back. “Do you want me to stop?”

Kagome shook her head. “No.”

Despite the pending discomfort, Kagome wanted this. The pain of rejection, buried deep within her soul could only be healed by Inuyasha. This would be much more than a temporary bandage. He was committed.

Inuyasha lay his face into her hair and then quickly thrust, breaking past her barrier in one fell swoop in hopes that it would curb her suffering. Kagome yelped through clenched jaws. With the sudden and surprising violation, the breath she had been holding burst past her lips. Guilt hit Inuyasha and he fought back the urge to continue thrusting. The tight grip in which she held him was sheer torture. It begged him to massage it while satisfying his own need for friction.

With her hands on Inuyasha’s lower back, Kagome held him still. After a few moments, her breathing slowed and her body adjusted to the large hard object inside of her. The tension and pain gradually eased and she slid her hands up Inuyasha’s back to clutch his shoulders.

“Okay,” she whispered in anticipation.

Inuyasha lifted his head and slid down to kiss her deeply which caused his shaft to partially withdraw. Both felt the effects. The sensation wrought a whimper from her that was accompanied by his groan. Inuyasha didn’t know if it was from pleasure, pain, or both. Continuing their deep heady kisses, they made slow and tender love to each other. Inuyasha gently stroked in and out of her, the act full of tenderness.

As Kagome’s vision blurred under the onslaught of sensation, her back arched while she writhed and moaned. In an attempt to breathe and calm what felt like insanity, she threw her head back, then brought it back up again to bury her face into the nook between Inuyasha’s neck and shoulder. The sensation of scalding heat running through her veins and swelling her body was causing her head to spin. Need ran rampant through every fiber of her being and took the reins. She pushed her hips harder and faster into him. Feeling her rising passion, Inuyasha groaned as his own desire to release heightened.

Time seemed to stand still for Inuyasha. The moment was overflowing with emotions and sensations that his body and soul had never entered his imagination. The only mind he had to speak of was his knowledge that he was one with the woman he loved. That knowledge drove his desire to thrust faster and harder. Her responsiveness paved the way for his passion to accelerate to unfathomable heights. The more friction she gave him, the more he craved. Sensation drowned him, washed over and through him, swirled inside his head.

Kagome suddenly Inuyasha’s his member growing larger. Her eyes flew open to see a sunbeam touching the face of a red-eyed hanyou. She drew in a surprised breath. The crimson red quickly disappeared, leaving gold on white in its place. Long, thick, white hair draped all around her as she looked up to see the puppy ears atop Inuyasha’s head.

 _‘Will he reject me now that he is back to that gruff exterior?’_ Kagome wondered with no small amount of trepidation.

As his transformation took place, Inuyasha saw the concern in her eyes. Through the haze of his lust, he gazed down into her chocolate orbs and quietly asked, “Are you okay...” to quell any fear, nervously adding, “Love?”

It felt strange and foreign on his tongue, but the last thing he wanted to do was scare her away. They had yet to finish their bonding and he would not be stopped, not when he had been so close.

Kagome smiled, relieved that he hadn’t freaked out. With a nod, she pulled her arms from under his and reached up to caress his ears. Inuyasha growled at the erotic tingling sensation. Lowering his head, he began making love to her again, being gentle and slow once more while Kagome continued to stroke his ears. As she became accustomed to his larger size, they became more fervent in there efforts to regain the level of ecstasy that snapped the pleasurable tension into throes of passionate release.

As Inuyasha left behind all gentleness and began to pound into her, Kagome clenched her jaws shut to muffle the scream of pleasure rising in her chest. Inuyasha felt the walls surrounding his manhood tighten. The sensation was driving him to the edge, but not so much that he didn’t notice Kagome’s countenance. He tightly covered her mouth with his as her first jolt of release sent a scream from her lips. Her convulsion sent him deep as his abdomen jerked to completely bury himself inside of her tight heat. Unexpectedly, his body snapped, his mind exploded, and his seed shot deep within his lover. Inuyasha did not ask and could not stop the instinctive urge to draw back and dig his fangs into the junction of her neck and shoulder. With his fangs buried in her, his mouth working to suck the blood down his throat, his body continued convulsing occasionally driving a needy thrust into her depths.

Kagome drew a sharp breath while still writhing beneath Inuyasha. Shivers of delight streaked through her body when the tips of his sharp fangs grazed the delicate skin of her neck. Her eyes squeezed shut and lips grew taught as she felt Inuyasha apply more pressure. Abruptly, his fangs were inside of her. It didn’t hurt as much as she would have thought. Instead, his fangs let off heated and soothing warmth. The pleasure of Inuyasha suckling her neck ripped through her and caused her body to strengthen its rhythmic gripping of his manhood, consequently extending his own flight into ecstasy.

Their throes of passion felt as though it had lasted for hours before they came down from the heights of their lovemaking. Kagome lay quivering and breathless beneath Inuyasha’s heaving chest. He raised his face from her hair and tenderly kissed her lips, sending another convulsion through her body. Inuyasha’s member flexed inside of her in response. Hoping to bring the same reaction, he kissed her with abandon. As he had hoped, she convulsed more, shuddered, and sent more pleasurable warmth through his body.

Passion’s heat gradually left their bodies. Inuyasha gripped Kagome from under her back and rolled them onto their sides while keeping their connection. He pinned her against himself, using his left leg to pull her right leg between his thighs. Kagome reached and pulled the blanket over them then buried her head into his chiseled hanyou chest as he gripped her soft petite body against him. They rested in each other’s embrace. Inuyasha nuzzled the top of her head as she kissed his chest. Silence filled the air as they rested. For the moment, all was peaceful, the deceptive calm before the storm.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

 ***Disclaimer***  
 _Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~


	4. The Morning After

~*~

 **Chapter 4**

 ** _The Morning After_**

 

Something tickled his nose and without opening his eyes, Inuyasha blew a puff of air upward from his lips. It didn’t help in the least. Cracking open one eye, he could see shining raven hair bundled up against his cheek. His senses immediately came alive. Memories came crashing down around him and he couldn’t believe what he’d allowed himself to do.

“Oh shit!” he exclaimed. “Shit, shit, shit!”

Kagome moaned and Inuyasha cringed and jumped from the bed. Turning around, he stared down in complete confusion.

Kagome lazily opened her eyes. “What is it, Inuyasha?”

Inuyasha just stood there, staring at her as her soft, chocolate eyes drifted shut again.

“Damn it, Kagome! Wake up,” he growled.

“What, Inuyasha? Today is Saturday, my day to sleep in. Besides, we were up all night,” she whined, burying her face into her pillow.

“That’s just it! WE were up all night. Sit Up!”

Kagome pulled herself to a sitting position and rubbed her sleepy eyes. “What’s the matter?” she groaned.

Inuyasha paced while trying to find a delicate way to begin the conversation, but found himself distracted.

“At least put a shirt on,” grumbled a more than annoyed Kagome.

Inuyasha noticed for the first time that he was stark naked. _‘What’s happening to me!’_ Reaching to the floor, he snatched up his shirt and then decided to go ahead and get completely dressed.

Kagome simply sat under the covers, resting her head on her knees not wanting to wake up. “It’s too early,” she groaned. “You might have youkai stamina, but I don’t.”

Inuyasha’s chest was tight. _‘What was I thinking?! What was she thinking?! This cannot be happening,’_ he protested as memories flooded his mind.

“Inuyasha, please sit down. You’re making me dizzy.”

Inuyasha plopped down on the bed with a huff.

“Kagome, we need to talk,” he stated in consternation.

Kagome did not want to talk. Her mind screamed at what he might say. He was different now. Sure, he had turned hanyou this morning, but he had already been in the midst of their passion when he’d transformed and his transformation couldn’t have been so complete as to include his mind, could it? _‘This is exactly what I was afraid of. His mind seems to accept his emotions so much better when he is human. Does he not even feel these things when he’s a hanyou?’_

“I don’t want to talk. Please, Inuyasha...don’t,’ muttered Kagome, fearing the absolute worst.

Inuyasha felt like a spring wound too tight. _‘I’m too weak when I’m human. Why couldn’t she have just said “No”, damn it!’_

“Kagome...” Inuyasha didn’t know what to say. “What are we going to do?”

“What do you mean?” Kagome did her best to avoid what was to come.

Inuyasha turned to look at her. Seeing an opportunity, she reached up to her neck and pulled her hair back.

“Have you forgotten?” she asked stroking his mark.

Inuyasha’s eyes flew wide. His head burned with the effort to break through the haze of the night before. _‘Marked! I marked her! Shit!’_ And, the curses against himself continued.

He didn’t know what to feel. Should he feel joy at her for accepting him as her mate? Should he feel angry that he was weak? Should he be angry with Kagome for allowing him to do such a thing? Should he be sad, believing that he could not stay with her because of his proclaimed determination to go to hell with Kikyou?

 _‘Is he regretting it,’_ thought Kagome, fear and the expectancy of heartache gripping her chest. She could not take this. It was just too much. _‘I need to think, alone.’_ Quickly, she pushed herself off the bed, legs giving way to the night’s events.

Inuyasha caught her and felt her trembling. _‘What have I done to her? I have hurt her in every way.’_

“Let me go, Inuyasha.”

He could hear the hurt in her voice and did not want to let her go. He could protect her from Naraku’s beasts, but not from himself. Leaning down to breathe in her scent, he gently released her, gazing into her eyes so full of pain. ‘Damn.’

Kagome weakly hobbled to her closet and retrieved a pink fluffy robe. She left him there.

Alone.

 

~*~*~*~*~

 

 _ ***Disclaimer***_

 _Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru._


	5. Aching

Kagome closed the bathroom door behind her and slid to the floor with her legs crossed, dropped her head, and stared at the pale blue tiles.

_‘Is this how it’s going to be? No love from the hanyou, only from the human? I love both of his sides and they can’t be that different, can they? What should I do now, forget about him? Insist that he keep the promise of his mark? I don’t want to make him feel trapped, but I can’t go back to the way we were before. I just can’t!’_

She reached up to her neck and lightly caressed his mark. Pulling her fingers away, she brought them to her nose. _‘It smells like him,’_ she thought sadly. She pulled her knees up resting her forehead on them as her heart welled up into her throat. _‘I can smell him on every inch of my body.’_

Tears welled up in her eyes. So that no one would hear the sobs welling in her throat, she quickly lifted herself and turned on the water in the sink and tub.

~*~

He paced. He thought. He could not get away from her scent. He wanted to run, but his mind suddenly went blank. The turmoil was just too much, and he didn’t know what to do. For the longest time, he stood, leaning against her window frame and staring out at the God tree. Its leaves swayed, causing light and shadow to dance in slow rhythm which soothed his frazzled mind.  
Something bothersome woke him from his stupor. Steam seeped from beneath the bathroom door bringing with it the scent of Kagome’s tears. Inuyasha’s heart lurched.

 _‘I never meant to hurt her. She does not deserve this and I don’t deserve her. I should leave and seal the well. I don’t need her to find the Shikon jewel shards. Miroku can see them. He is not as sensitive to their presence so it will take us longer, but we don’t need her,’_ he rationalized, trying to convince himself he could save her from heartache if he left her behind. _‘I should just go.’_ However, the scent of her tears held him in place and he wanted to run to her, to comfort her.

_‘I wish she would stop that crying. I hate it when she cries. Damn it to hell.’_ Losing his will to leave Kagome to her thoughts, Inuyasha strode out of her room and made his way down the hall to the bathroom door. His stomach was bunching into sickening knots as the smell of her tears became stronger. He hesitantly stood at the door looming before him, the door that was hiding something from him, something so important it scared him.

~*~

The hot bath felt good on her aching muscles and relieved some of the tension. While her sobbing had finally subsided, lonely tears still trickled down her cheeks. Turning onto her stomach, she stuck her face under the water and held it there in hopes that by washing away the already shed tears, she could dam up anymore that might try to escape. As her mind ran rampant, she pressed her forehead against the bottom of the tub.

_‘Why is he doing this? He said he loved me. I don’t care if he was human. He said it, and he meant it. I can’t believe that he could change no matter what his form. What is he going to do now? Is he just going to dump me? If he did that, I could not go back with him to look for the shards. I just couldn’t.’_

Perhaps it was the water’s heat, but she could feel her lungs trying to push out as her throat tightened preparing for a whimper. She pulled up onto her hands and knees and then sat back on her legs. Quickly grabbing a washcloth and holding it to her lips, she tried to stifle her sobs. What rushed out of her wasn’t a whimper. Shocking even to her, it was more of a howling scream. 

Kagome held the washcloth as tightly to her face as possible, eyes closed tight, body trembling, and unsuccessfully did her best to keep her jaw clenched in order to stifle the sound of her agony.

~*~*~*~*~*~

_***Disclaimer*** _

_Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru._

 

~*~*~*~*~*~


	6. Choices

The door awaited Inuyasha, and the overwhelming scent of tears drew out his own. _‘What can I say to her? I know what I want. I just don’t know what is right.’_ He felt like an ignorant beast, no ability to reason logically and so confused.

_‘Do I think different when I am human? It is only for one night. I can’t even begin to know myself, what I think, and how I feel. Kagome is human. Maybe she can help me to do the right thing.’_ Furrowed brows suddenly shot up as Inuyasha’s eyes widened.

“Kagome...” he called hearing her wail. Without a second thought, he burst through the door, heedless of whether or not it had been locked, not that he would have cared after hearing Kagome’s weeping. He didn’t allow her another breath before he scooped her up into his arms and held her face to his chest with his large clawed hand. He didn’t know what to say. Kagome didn’t give him time as she sucked in another breath, grasped his robe, stuck her face hard into his chest, and let out another wail. 

He sat down on the floor with her cradled in his lap. “Kagome, please stop. You know how I hate it when you cry.”

Kagome pushed herself away from him and stared into his eyes, her countenance becoming hard and unforgiving. “You bastard,” she hissed, slapping him hard enough to turn his face to the side.

Keeping his face turned away from her, he closed his eyes.

“I hate it when I cry too! It makes me feel weak!” she half yelled half sobbed.

“You make me weak,” she lowered her voice.

“You...I love you...” she sobbed, “and, I don’t know if you are lost to me.”

Inuyasha opened his eyes and turned back to gaze down into Kagome’s. Her words echoed in his confused mind. Unsure of what to say and hoping to somehow reassure her of his feelings for her, he followed his instincts and lowered his face to her neck, to his mark, and tenderly licked it, sending shivers through Kagome’s body.

“Please, Inuyasha, don’t...not if you’re going to leave me,” she uttered almost inaudibly, lowering her forehead to his chest.

Inuyasha tightened his hold on her, words escaping his lips of their own accord. “I could never leave you, but I am so confused. I need your help to understand,” he whispered into her hair beginning to caress her head. “What I did...I feel like I took advantage of you.”

Kagome could feel her tense body relax as she took a long breath shuddering as she released it. _‘He didn’t say he loved me. What does he want from me? Help him understand what?’_ Now she was confused.

“I don’t understand, Inuyasha.”

Seeing Kagome like this had to be one of the worst things he’d ever experienced and he never wanted to witness it again. If it took baring his innermost thoughts, he would have to do it.

“I love you, but I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t know what is right, what is wrong. What was I thinking when I was human? What am I then? What am I now? I feel like two people who don’t know each other, like when I am transformed as a full demon. I need your help to understand, to know myself, to know what I should do, what we should do. I don’t know what to do, Kagome.”

Kagome wrapped her arms around his waist and squeezed not wanting to let go. _‘He said he loved me. He finally said it in his hanyou form,’_ she sighed in relief. _‘That’s just it. Who chooses who. Is that what he’s confused about?’_

“Inuyasha?”

“Yeah, Kagome?” Inuyasha searched her eyes looking for answers.

“Your human form chose me when you climbed into my bed. Your hanyou form chose me when you marked me. The hanyou was not confused, and neither was the human that followed his heart. You are confused because you know what you want, but you don’t know the difference between me and Kikyou.”

Inuyasha was silent at that. He had obligations that she couldn’t understand, but he wasn’t confused about who he truly wanted at his side. Her misunderstanding only led to hurt, and it was one of the reasons he shouldn’t have been so weak as to take her and make her his.

Kagome’s intuition told her where his confusion lay, but he had to make his own choices.

“You made your promise to Kikyou. Even though my heart and mind is my own, I possess Kikyou’s soul. Just what part of me do you love? What part of Kikyou do you love? Whom did you truly make that promise to? I could be wrong, but I would hope that the promise was made to me. I am myself and Kikyou at the same time just as you are human and demon at the same time. Does this make sense to you? Your confusion will persist as long as you can’t choose. You must figure it out on your own, and you must choose. I can’t do it for you.”

Kagome waited. With each passing moment, she felt a stronger urge to throw up. She clutched the back of Inuyasha’s robe in her tiny hands, feeling as though it would be the last time he would ever hold her in his arms, the last time she would ever feel the warmth of his body against hers, and she wanted this permanently etched into her memory.

Inuyasha’s eyes roamed around the sky-blue, tiled bathroom as he slowly processed what Kagome had just said.

_‘She is like me, like a hanyou. But, she has no confusion. Neither does Kikyou. Kikyou loves to hate me. Yet, even with Kikyou’s soul, Kagome loves me. I don’t love Kikyou anymore, do I? It is her soul that is in Kagome. Gods, this is hard. Who did I make that promise to?’_

“I’m cold, Inuyasha.”

Rather than standing up and grabbing a towel, Inuyasha tugged off his robe and helped Kagome slip into it while only partially aware of his actions. Kagome looked up at him as he helped her with the sleeves. The mark she had left on his cheek was beginning to turn purple. She hadn’t realized that she had slapped him so hard.

“I’m so sorry I hit you. Please forgive me, Inuyasha,” she whispered, capturing his gaze and staring into his golden orbs.

“It’s okay. I deserved it,” he said slowly leaning down and tenderly resting his lips on hers as he wrapped her waist in his large hands.

_‘She is right. I must choose,’_ thought the confused, ignorant hanyou while he deepened his kiss and ran his tongue along her lips. It was so difficult to let her go, to allow the night before to be just a memory. Leaning into his kiss and tipping her head back with a crooked finger, he ran his tongue along the soft inner fold of her lips and begged for entrance.

Despite everything that had happened, Kagome could not help herself. Opening up her heart with a bittersweet love, she allowed him to taste her and allowed herself to savor him.

_‘Has he made his choice?’_

~*~*~*~*~*~

__***Disclaimer***  
   
Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru.  
   
   
~*~*~*~*~*~


	7. Promises to Keep

Intoxicating, that is what she was. Silky, raven hair tangled in his fingers. Heated breath flowed across his cheeks, into his nostrils, and throughout his body, the scent so erotic, so enticing. Even with his eyes closed, he could feel the blush in her lips and in her soft cheeks. So scintillating was her sweet nectar that he could barely imagine denial of this ambrosia concocted by the gods. He _wanted_ her. He wanted to ravage her like an animal, and at the same time, fill her with his tender, yet passionate love. He wanted both. But, would it be fair to her? Would that he could deny the promise made to another. Was there a loophole, a way out, a way to delay the inevitable, a way to keep her wrapped in his embrace for eternity? His heart fought like a beast in chains, frustration bordering on fury.

More than anything in the world, she wanted always to be able to touch him, to feel his embrace warming her skin, to gaze into the blazing golden eyes that mirrored the soul he had once tried so hard to hide from her. Everything she ever needed, everything she had ever desired was slowly slipping from her grasp. The fates could not be so cruel. They could not abandon her like this. The loss of his strength, protection, and devotion would be lethal to her belief in love. It would simply cease to exist. Life would become a meaningless toil to face every day with no expectation of happiness. Clutching his waist, she felt as though her heart were being ripped from her chest and stabbed a thousand times over.

Painfully, Inuyasha slowly withdrew his lips. In one smooth and fluid motion, he stood, taking Kagome with him, his eyes never leaving hers. He cradled her in his arms while he carried her to her bedroom. She did not want to let go when he sat her down on the bed. She clutched him with her tiny fingers until he gently slid his large fingers around hers and slowly tore them from his shirt. It hurt his soul seeing her pained expression when he lifted himself away from her. He sucked in a deep breath and let it leave him as he turned and gazed out her window.

In the back of his mind, beyond his reach, something she had said made sense. Like a puzzle, he needed to put the pieces together. He could not think when he was with her. She consumed his every thought.

“Kagome?”

She simply stared at him, numbing herself for his departure.

_‘Will he ever come back for me?’_

“I…I need to sort things out and I can’t do it here,” he stammered.

Her heart felt like a dead stone and it showed in her expression. To him, she looked lifeless.

“Will you come back...Inuyasha?” asked Kagome, her tone of voice uncharacteristically flat and devoid of all emotion.

Inuyasha said nothing. He did not want to make promises he might not be able to keep.

Kagome, drained of emotion, watched as he silently stepped to her, bent down and tenderly licked the mark on her neck. After placing a chaste kiss on her cheek, he disappeared through her window.

~*~

Inuyasha hopped out of the well and into his own time, nearly knocking Shippou off the lip of it with his knee. The little copper furred fox child rolled backward and fell to the ground.

“Where’s Kagome, Inuyasha?” asked the innocent little creature, anxious to see the woman he adopted as his mother.

Shippou stuck his nose outward toward Inuyasha in an attempt to smell the scent of the woman he had adopted as his surrogate mother. “You smell like her. Why do you look so sad? Is she alright?”

“Feh! Kagome is just fine, brat!” Inuyasha huffed, attempting to sound his usual self. “Where are Sango and Miroku? You shouldn’t be out here all by yourself. One of Naraku’s demons might do me the favor of devouring you.”

Shippou rolled his eyes at Inuyasha. “They aren’t very far away. Come on.”

“No. I’ll find them later,” Inuyasha sighed. “Go away,” he scowled at Shippou and then turned and trudged into the forest in the opposite direction of his friends’ scents.

Shippou stared wide-eyed. _‘Inuyasha didn’t even try to thump me on the head!’_ Shaking his head in disbelief, he returned to Sango and Miroku. Per usual, the monk lay unconscious on the ground, his black and purple robes flared out, and a very large knot on his head. Shippou chuckled and stared up at Sango, the demon slayer, a red tinge to her cheeks.

“Do you think he will ever learn to keep his hands to himself?” Shippou asked with a grin.

“Not likely. He still asks every woman he meets to bear his child,” spat the petite, dark-eyed, brown-haired slayer as she glared down at Miroku.

Sango’s boomerang often came in handy. Its length spanned all of five feet and weighed nearly as much as the monk. Unfortunately for him, his head frequently made contact with it. 

A groan was heard from the ground as he gained consciousness. Rubbing his head, he looked up to give Sango a sly grin. “Ah, my dear Sango, it was worth the pain,” he cooed. It was always worth the pain to see fire in her eyes instead of the sadness that always seemed to linger.

“Hentai!” She glared and stomped her foot, barely missing the monk’s hand.

His grin became wider. Annoying her gave her something to focus on other than her deep hatred of the demon that killed her family. He knew that, deep down, she liked his attention, even though it was a bit crude. Many times, he had caressed her bottom, and many times, he had been knocked out cold. But, it was worth it, always. Why else would Sango walk and stand so close beside him? Why else would she allow him to ride behind her on her firecat, always innocently sliding back to fit snug between his thighs? More than once he had noticed her gazing at him when she thought he was asleep. One day, her enemy would be defeated and he would have her all to himself. Only then would he be able to ask her to marry him and bear his child. She would be the one, no one else. He smiled and gazed at her with all the love in his heart and was pleased when her cheeks turned a deep crimson.

_‘I can’t stand him!’_ she lied to herself. _‘Why does he ask every woman he sees to bear his child? He never once asked me. Does he think I am beneath him? Damn houshi!’_

Every time the hentai monk touched her, he gave her a reason to knock the shit out of him, and she enjoyed every opportunity. Her pent up frustration was somewhat eased with every blow.

_‘Humph! Why should I care if he asks me? I don’t even like him!’_ she lied to herself again.

“I take it Inuyasha has not yet returned, Shippou,” commented Miroku in that smooth, sultry voice that Sango hated so much. Her body always betrayed her mind with the desire to hear him whisper into her ear.

_‘Damn houshi,’_ she glowered at him.

Noticing the angry stare, Miroku gave her a wry smirk. He knew what was going on in her mind, or rather, her body. He just loved making her blush. That crimson tinge to her cheeks made her so sensual, so desirable.

Shippou never gave away that he knew what was going on. “Yep, Inuyasha came back, but he went into the forest.”

Miroku looked at Shippou in surprise. “I wonder what that is all about?” questioned the hentai monk while his stayed focused solely on Sango.

She just shrugged her shoulders. “You never know with that jerk. He probably argued with Kagome again.”

Miroku sighed in disappointment. “You are probably right, Sango. He is one thoughtless hanyou.”

Abruptly, Inuyasha stepped forward out of nowhere, causing Sango and Miroku to gasp in surprise.

“Ah, Inuyasha. We were just talking about you,” said Miroku, smiling with innocence at a disgruntled hanyou.

“I know you were talking shit about me. My ears itched,” growled Inuyasha with his ears pinned back against his head.

Miroku and Sango gave each other a knowing look. Now was not a good time to annoy Inuyasha.

“So, how is Kagome?” asked Sango, quickly changing the subject.

Inuyasha’s ears drooped, even though his response was quite normal. “The wench is just fine!”

“Is she coming back soon?” asked Shippou, unable to hide his anxious excitement.

A flash of pain crossed Inuyasha’s face before he regained his composure.

“Feh! You know Kagome. She’ll come back when she’s good and ready,” spat Inuyasha with an almost imperceptible tinge of sadness then he stood and silently jumped to a high branch of the nearest tree.

Miroku and Sango knew how keen Inuyasha’s hearing was. They did not say a word, but both knew that something was very wrong. Their friend sat, seemingly hypnotized as the new moon rose into the sky. It was obvious that something serious was going on. 

His friends below prepared to bed down for the night, neither in the mood to sleep. They both lay down, occasionally exchanging glances and tried not to stare up at Inuyasha’s lonely figure.

~*~

Kagome suddenly stood with fists clenched. Now she understood some of what her mother had felt when her father had died. _‘If mama can be so strong, I can too. I won’t sit here feeling sorry for myself!’_ She strode to her closet and picked out the most cheerful-colored clothes she could find, dressed, and headed downstairs.

“Hi, Mama! Hi, Souta!” she chirped with a smile, very cheerfully, too cheerfully.

_‘Oh, Kagome. You’ve had another argument with that friend of yours. Why do you punish yourself so?’_ thought Kagome’s mother. A mother could always tell when her child was hurting and Ms. Higurashi was no exception.

“Hey, Kag! Watcha been up to? When do I get to see your dog friend again?” Souta asked. 

Souta reminded her so much of Shippou. Suddenly, she wanted to see Shippou more than anything. She loved her annoying brother, but Shippou was like her own son, a whole different kind of love altogether. Sadness welled up in her chest.

_‘No! I’m going to enjoy this day, and the day after that, and the day after that!’_ her mind commanded her heart.

“Would you like some pickles, Souta?” Her mother, bless her heart, had saved her. “They are very crisp and so good.” Her mother smiled and stuck a pickle in Souta’s mouth.

“Thanks, mama.” She lowered herself to the table, across from Souta and her grandpa, grateful that her mother had so conveniently interrupted. The food her mother filled her plate with looked delicious, but she was not hungry. She played with her food and finally asked to be excused. _‘A stroll outside in the fresh air might clear my mind.’_

“Kagome? Aren’t you going to eat your dinner? Your mother went to a lot of trouble making it,” chided her grandfather.

“Yes, Kagome. You go right ahead,” said Ms. Higurashi in answer to Kagome’s request. “Grandpa, I can’t eat another bite. Would like my squash?” asked Kagome’s mother stuffing a slice of squash in his mouth. 

_'Another save.’_

“Thanks, Mama,” Kagome gently replied and took her dishes to the sink.

“That’s alright honey. I’ll get the dishes,” her mother sweetly intoned.

This scene was not out of the ordinary, not with her constant ups and downs in her relationship with Inuyasha.

Before heading out the door, Kagome turned and bent down to pet her cat, Buyo. The furball was always a comfort. She wandered around outside the house, finally ending up beneath the centuries old god tree. Something stirred inside of her and she looked up. The god tree, with the place on the trunk bare of bar where Inuyasha had once been sealed, blocked the sun. _‘I remember when we first met.’_ The first time she had ever seen Inuyasha, he had been pinned to the tree by an arrow. A powerful spell held him there in a perpetual, unearthly sleep. She had marveled at his appearance. Long flowing silver hair flowed over his shoulders, down his arms, and framed the sweetest, boyish face she had ever seen. His head had been adorned with puppy dog ears on top his head. Of course, his countenance had completely changed after she had freed him. Her heart ached. She had come to know him as a stubborn, selfish jerk, only to discover that his insolence protected a heart of gold, a broken and bleeding heart. With all the times he risked his life to protect and defend her; she had grown to love his protectiveness and his seeming possessiveness. 

Kagome knelt dropping her head, tears staining the ground. _‘I wish I had never fallen through the well, never laid eyes on him. If I had known it would hurt this much...’_

Kagome’s mother walked toward her obviously heartbroken daughter.

“Kagome,” she gently spoke from behind.

Kagome rose and turned. She couldn’t help herself from wrapping her arms around her mother’s neck and sobbing uncontrollably. 

Her mother led her to the bench where they sat together, her mother wrapping an arm around her.

“I don’t know what has you so upset, Kagome. But, I will always be here if you want to talk about it. I know how independent you are and I am sure you will make the right choices,” Ms. Higurashi murmured. After a brief pause, during which she rubbed comforting circles on Kagome’s back, she continued. “You know, this tree has always helped me to clear my thoughts and make decisions that my heart has never regretted.”

Kagome sat still, enjoying her mother’s comfort. Seeing that Kagome had calmed, Miss Higurashi kissed the top of her daughter’s head and retreated to the house to let her daughter think. Now, Kagome sat alone under the tree, gazing at the place had she first met the man—no, hanyou that she so dearly loved.

_‘Why should I have to give him up? Why should he have to leave me and go to hell with his long dead girlfriend, Kikyou? It isn’t right and I’m not a quitter. I won’t give him up. I won’t lose him to a demon that thinks it is his friend and one day lover. It’s not going to happen!’_

Having made up her mind, Kagome quickly strode to the house and marched up the stairs to pack her things into the yellow backpack she always carried to take essentials and goodies back to the past, to Inuyasha’s time. Looking around to decide what to pack first, her eyes swept over the top of her desk. 

She gazed at the sketchpads. _‘I wonder if…’_

~*~

Inuyasha leaned his head against the trunk of the tree. He was nowhere near solving the puzzle Kagome had given him. But, there was one thing he knew; he knew he had to do it. Solving what, for him, was a riddle, would bring him and Kagome together. He just knew it. He closed his eyes then sensed something. Opening his eyes, he could see the faint blue glow of Kikyou’s soul stealers, those snake-like floating beasts that gathered the souls of dead women. Only the souls kept the clay version of Kikyou animated.

Inuyasha sighed. _‘How many times must she torture me? How many times will I torture Kagome by chasing after Kikyou?’_

__’Kagome…’_ _

__

~*~*~*~*~*~

**_*Disclaimer*_ **

Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru.

~*~*~*~*~*~


	8. Honorable Decision

Kagome opened the latest dated sketchpad and turned to the first blank page.  Quickly opening the center drawer of the desk, she pulled out a package of colored pencils and began a painstakingly detailed sketch.  It would be some time before the sketch was finished, but she believed Inuyasha could wait.

The moon had risen high into the night sky before she had finished. Packing the sketch and pencils, she turned to inspect the room.  Throwing a few other items into her backpack, she headed for the back door leaving a note on the kitchen table.  It was the first time she had ever ventured through the well alone after dark.  Swallowing hard, she leapt over the edge.  
 

~*~

   
Inuyasha watched as Kikyou’s soul stealers faded from view.  Sango and Miroku could not help but stare and hope he would not follow.  They held their breath. When Inuyasha did not move, they breathed a sigh of relief, but it was short-lived.  Inuyasha quietly leapt from his perch seeming to float to the ground.  He was so silent, that had they been asleep, they would not have noticed.  He stood for a long moment and then wandered away.

“Damn him!” exclaimed Sango after she felt he was out of hearing range.

“I agree, Sango.  But, put yourself in his position.  He had first told Kikyou that he would stay with her," Miroku quietly implored.  “How would Kagome feel if he did not honor his word?  Would she believe she could ever trust him?”

“I see your point, but consider this.  Kagome loves him enough that she has risked her life for him time and time again.  Do you think she wouldn’t accept everything about Inuyasha?  Do you think she would stop loving him, even if he did go to Kikyou?  She has seen him slaughter bandits and come after her.  She has endured his hateful jibes.  Yet, she does not try to change him.  It doesn’t matter what he does or says.  She has always, and _will_ always remain at his side, no matter what.  Sure, she gets mad and stomps off.  But, she always comes back after she’s cooled down.  She has never abandoned him, regardless of everything he has put her through.  She follows her heart, not her mind.  Do you think she has not wondered why she stays with such a jerk?  I do not think he could push her away even if he tried.  So, do you think it would matter to her if he broke his promise to Kikyou?”

Miroku considered Sango’s words stroking his chin, brows furrowed.  “I have never thought of Kagome’s devotion as being that intense.”

“Men,” Sango huffed. “You just don’t pay attention when it comes to women.”

Miroku studied her, wondering if he had underestimated her feelings for him as well.  _'Is she trying to tell me something?'_

Inuyasha stood still in the darkness listening to their conversation.

_‘I know how Kagome feels, but it doesn’t make breaking my promise right.’_

Pushing those thoughts aside, Inuyasha continued on his way.  
 

~*~

   
Carrying her heavy backpack, Kagome struggled to climb from the well.  She gasped when two large clawed hands reached down, grabbed her arms, and hauled her up and out.

“Oh, Inuyasha!  You scared the life out of me,” she heaved trembling.

“Just what do you think you’re doing, wench, coming out here in the middle of the night?  You know how dangerous it is.”  He spoke low and quiet while steadying her.

Inuyasha stared into her eyes waiting for an answer, hoping for something his mind could not quite grasp, but what he saw shook him to the very core.  Grief so deep, it appeared bottomless, and threatened to swallow him whole.  It was only a glimpse for it was suddenly capped and hidden under a glare of determination.

“I came to see you.”

Letting go, Inuyasha studied her, drinking in the vision before him.  He could still smell the scent of his mark and longed to caress it, but was afraid of the effect such contact would have on them.

“Come on, I’ll take you to camp,” said Inuyasha, taking her backpack and turning away from her.

“Why were you here?” asked Kagome, gazing at him out of the corner of her eye.

Inuyasha stood still for a moment.  Without turning back to her, he muttered, “I missed you.”

He did not mention that his heart ached for her and that the well smelled of her scent making him feel closer to her.

Hope leapt in Kagome’s heart.  She still had a fighting chance.  Stepping up to his side, she hesitantly took his large clawed hand in hers.  Instead of pulling away, he looked down and gave her a weak smile squeezing her hand, so small compared to his own.  Inuyasha led the way, somehow taking path that passed the God tree.

“Let’s stop here for a moment, Inuyasha.”

He looked at her quizzically, but followed her lead, sitting down against the trunk of the tree.  Kagome pulled out a flashlight and sketchpad.

“I’ve already looked through your sketches, Kagome.”

Her eyes widened.

“When did you do that?!” she asked, feeling that her privacy had been violated by the invasion into her heart’s desires and most personal thoughts.

“On the moonless night, when I put you to bed, when…we made love.  I apologize if I offended you.”

_‘So that’s what motivated him to take the risk. Perhaps it was a good thing.’_

“Here, hold this.” She handed him the flashlight.

He held the light to the pad as she flipped through the pages.

“Here.”  She showed him the page she had just filled with her heart’s longings.

“Can Kikyou give you this?”

Inuyasha studied it.  Their companions filled the background.  In the forefront he and Kagome stood. They were gazing into each other’s eyes while his hand rested on the belly of a very pregnant Kagome.  Inuyasha furrowed his brow trying to push down the tingling sensation rising from his stomach.  He had never imagined this scenario.  Kagome was way ahead of him.  With his mark came this promise.  Inuyasha sighed, his mind going blank as it had the night he had first looked at her sketches.

Kagome watched him intently.  She was not going to deride Kikyou.  It would be wrong and he would know that.  Instead, she showed him what she could offer in hopes that he understood what he would be giving up.  There did not seem to be a right or wrong in this situation, only a choice.  He had made a promise, not understanding who or what he had made that promise to, and still felt obligated to keep it.  At the same time, he had taken a perfectly understandable action with Kagome, leaving another promise.  Kagome knew what Kikyou was, but he had to figure that out on his own.  Even Urasue, the witch that had made Kikyou’s clay body, had admitted that the copy was a false replica, a monster.

As Inuyasha stared at the sketch, in his soul, even to the darkest recesses, the scene felt right.  He didn’t understand why, it just did.

_‘Should I follow my instincts, my heart, like Kagome does?'_ His mind drifted back to the conversation between Sango and Miroku.  _‘Kagome seems to always know what is right. Well, almost always,’_ he thought, remembering her protection of the wolf demon that had kidnapped her.

As the silence crept on and Kagome heard Inuyasha's sigh, her heart sank.  She leaned back against the tree and waited for what seemed like an eternity.  _'Maybe he'll never figure it out.'_

He thought back to the night that they had made love, trying to recall his human thoughts at the time, trying to remember his reasoning for taking Kagome as his mate.  He knew it couldn’t have been a whim.

_‘Kikyou couldn’t stop time after all,’_ he remembered, thinking of that night.  _‘What did that mean?  Hell!  It all boils down to the fact that I can only keep one promise.  I just have to choose which one.  Either way, I will be breaking a promise...Kikyou is dead,'_ he thought as he stared at the picture of the possibility of actually having children.  _'Kagome is not.  Kikyou hates me.  Kagome loves me and visa versa.  I can have a family with Kagome, only death with Kikyou.  I did not promise to die for Kikyou.  Huh?!  She wants me dead, but I did not promise her that!  I told Kikyou I would protect her, but she is already dead, and I told her I couldn’t help her when she tried to drag me into hell.  I told Kagome I would protect her and she is still alive.  I can keep that promise.  Kikyou would never have me as a hanyou.  Kagome loves me for who I am.’_

As thoughts swirled through Inuyasha’s mind, making him dizzy, Kagome had her eyes closed.  It was late and she was tired.  Nodding off, she slid to the side.  Inuyasha saw her out of the corner of his eye and quickly reached out and pulled her back up.

“Mmm,” she moaned.

_‘She’s already asleep.  The girl has no tolerance for late nights.’_

He smiled.  She looked so peaceful.  Shielding her from the night air, he put his arm around her, pulling her close.  As he stroked her hair away from her face, butterflies rose in his stomach.  He couldn’t resist.  He leaned down and traced barely there kisses from her forehead to her eyelids, down her cheeks and across her lips.  Nuzzling her neck and smelling the scent of his mark, couldn’t help but tenderly lick the punctures.  

At the tickling sensation on her skin, Kagome stirred.  “Inuyasha? What are you doing?”

In answer, he slid his fangs directly above the marks on her neck.  Having already treated the mark with his mating saliva, Kagome felt no pain when he slid his fangs into the place they should be.  Her stomach sank inward as her body convulsed in orgasm.  Her mewling moan entreated Inuyasha to pull her into his lap to straddle him.  Cupping her face in his large hands, he drew her lips to his.  Begging for her favor, her acceptance, he tugged at bottom lip, wetting it with his own warm moisture.  Her body, still trembling from the effects of his bite, shuddered in pleasure and desire.  This was too much.  He hadn’t given an answer and she didn’t want to open herself up to more pain.

Pushing him away, she murmured, “I can’t, Inuyasha.  I must first know that you will stay with me.”

Inuyasha caressed the mark on her neck, sending shivers down her spine, causing her back to involuntarily arch.

“Please, Inuyasha.  No more.”

Clutching her to him, he buried his face between her breasts.  Tipping his head back, he gazed into her eyes.  “Kagome, I would have none other than you,” he whispered his decision as his hands traveled up her back.

Perched in a tree, Kikyou watched from afar.  She watched as he re-instated his mark.  She watched as they slowly and tenderly removed one another’s clothes. 

She watched.

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**__**

**_~*~_ **

**_*Disclaimer*_ **

Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru.

~*~


	9. Easier Said Than Done

Inuyasha, palms pressed against the god tree, leaned into Kagome and shared his warmth. Their tongues tussled as she wrapped her legs around his waist, held up by his weight pushing her back into the tree. The cool, gentle midnight breeze gently wafted over their bare skin. Inuyasha stiffened and pulled his lips from Kagome when the breeze changed direction. His ears searched for unnatural sounds while he tipped his nose up and sniffed the air.

“What is it, Inuyasha?”

He gazed down into her eyes with what appeared to be worry.

“Hurry up and get dressed,” he growled and lifted her down to her feet.

“What is it?” she asked again.

He looked at her as though he was incapable of speech.

“Kikyou,” he hesitantly whispered.

Kagome gasped and both dressed in a hurry.

“Stay here,” he commanded.

“I beg your pardon! You’re my mate. I won’t be left behind while you meet with her,” snorted Kagome with one ticking eyebrow raised.

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes at her. “I need to handle this on my own. Don’t you trust me?”

“There’s no such thing as trust. The only thing I trust is that you are as imperfect as the rest of us. Trust puts someone on a pedestal of perfection that the person cannot possibly uphold. We all have our weaknesses. You may need my help, my support,” asserted Kagome with conviction.

Inuyasha stood stunned, mouth agape. _‘How could she say that she can’t believe in trust? I thought she trusted me?’_ Finally, he managed to form words. 

“Do whatever you want. I can’t stop you.”

He turned and stalked away. Kagome let him put a good amount of distance between them before she began following, determined not to lose what she had just found and, what she hoped with all her heart now belonged to her; even if she was extremely pissed right now. 

Inuyasha glanced back. He didn’t know how to feel about what she had said. It hurt and made him angry to think that she didn’t trust him. But then again, could he trust himself? He had to come face to face with Kikyou and had to reject her.

_‘Am I strong enough to do this? Can I turn my back as if it is nothing? How do I do it? How?’_

He furrowed his brow and slowed his steps hoping to give himself time to figure out how to let Kikyou down as gently as possible.

“Inuyasha,” a familiar voice cooed with an undertone of malice.

He looked up to see Kikyou lazily reclined in a large tree. Her soul stealers were bringing her the souls of dead women. It saddened him to know that those women were someone’s daughter, perhaps sister or mother.

“How can you take their souls, Kikyou?” asked Inuyasha, lamenting her fallen state.

“To be near you...my love. You belong to me. Remember? You promised.”

“What did I promise?” Inuyasha played the game this time, instead of allowing her to control the conversation.

“You said you wanted to stay with me forever,” pouted the replica of the woman he once loved.

“...if only time could stand still,” he replied. “And you asked if I would like it if you made time stand still. Did you make time stand still, Kikyou?”

He remembered, finally. He had believed that, if time could stand still, they could be together. She had made the offer. The memory was a bit blurry, though.

Kikyou glared. “If that girl hadn’t so rudely interrupted, I would have had you in hell with me.”

“Why were you taking me to hell, Kikyou? The Kikyou I knew would not have been in hell,” he smirked then stepped closer to the tree. Check.

“Enough questions!” Kikyou floated down to Inuyasha borne on her soul stealers.

“What’s the matter, Kikyou? Afraid I’ll find out what you really are? A bag of clay and bones? A golem? A monster?” He stood straight crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Kikyou softened her gaze. “Where should I have gone? Your betrayal caused the hatred in my heart. That hatred is what sent me there. YOU sent me there, Inuyasha,” she murmured, putting as much martyrdom into her voice as possible. Check mate.

Inuyasha’s heart sank. The guilt he had thought Kagome to have purged from him resurfaced.

“Inuyasha, we were meant to be together. I will not rest until we are.” She stepped forward placing her cold, hard hand to his cheek.

Inuyasha closed his eyes with the pain she instilled. He drifted to the memories of his time with her. Kikyou grinned as, yet again, Inuyasha began to fall under her wicked spell.

“Come, Inuyasha,” she whispered and wrapped her arms around the neck of the hanyou then placed her cold lips to his. Her spell drew him in and plunged him into the dark depths of unconsciousness.

“No! You can’t have him!” yelled Kagome. “Inuyasha! Wake up! Don’t let her take you!”

“You are a nuisance!” scowled Kikyou and pointed her finger toward Kagome.

“Go. Away.” Light emanated from the tip of her finger and turned into a white, coiled ball of power. 

As the ball shot toward Kagome, she screamed. “Inuyasha!”

Inuyasha’s eyes snapped open, her panicked voice having broken the golem’s spell. “Kagome!” 

He jumped from Kikyou’s arms to grab Kagome out of harm’s way and to encircle her in a protective embrace. “Are you okay?”

“Mmm,” she nodded.

The golem glared at them.

“You are mine, Inuyasha!” she declared.

“You are not Kikyou,” Inuyasha firmly stated, finally having figured out the puzzle. “Go back to where you came from.”

The perverted creation of the witch Urasue gasped. The one chain that bound the thing to this world had been broken. There was no one she could cling to for purpose in the world of the living. Souls of dead women began to flee her body of earth and bones.

“Noooo,” cried out the false image of Kikyou as her body disintegrated. 

Inuyasha squeezed Kagome tightly. She sighed in relief and brought her forehead to rest against his chest. Now would be a perfect time for her to say ’I told you so’. But, that wasn’t Kagome’s way of doing things and Inuyasha appreciated that. 

"Are you okay, Inuyasha?"

"Kikyou died over fifty years ago. I just haven't been willing to accept it. That wasn't Kikyou. Even Urasue said she was a demon, but I couldn't give Kikyou up," he sadly stated. "But, you’re here now. That's all that matters," he murmured smiling at her.

"Thank you, Inuyasha."

“Now, where were we before we were so rudely interrupted?” grinned a relieved hanyou at Kagome and then rose from his squatting position beside her.

“I think we were about here.” She squirmed out of his arms, wrapped hers around his neck, and hopped up to straddle his waist between her legs.

Inuyasha purred and a low growl formed in his chest when she reached up and stroked his ears…

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**_*Disclaimer*_ **

Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru.

~*~*~*~*~*~


	10. Trust

Something was eating at his guts. Instinct was taking over. His old, hanyou jerk was fighting, insisting that he needed its protection again. He searched Kagome’s deep, chocolate eyes, looking for an answer. Though his body thrilled at touching hers while he pinned her to the ground beneath him, he could not get out of his mind what she had said about trust. 

Kagome looked at him with confusion when suddenly he rolled away from her and sat cross-legged, arms crossing his chest, a scowl on his face. It was the same scowl she had seen a thousand times before.

"What's wrong, Inuyasha?" she asked concerned and sat up, a bit frustrated at his sudden change.

"Trust," he nearly spat cocking an ear back toward her.

"What about it?"

"If you do not believe in TRUST, how can you trust me to stay with you? And, if you can't trust me, how long will it be before you...don't want to be with me anymore? How can I trust you?"

"It's not like that," she sighed.

"Then how is it, Kagome?!" he nearly shouted, his voice a mixture of anger, questioning, sadness, and at the same time, hope that she could explain it in a way that he could accept.

Kagome sighed. "How about I explain it this way. Most things are not a matter of trust, but of what you believe in your heart, to be true. I believe that nothing is certain, so we should take each moment as it comes. I believe in you, in your intentions, in your love for me. But, I also believed that it was possible for Kikyou to put you under a spell. Is that trust? No. It is reality. You did not think about that when you asked me to trust you. You wanted me to believe that you could face Kikyou all by yourself. Knowing a person is more important than putting them on a pedestal and expecting behavior that they can’t possibly abide by."

"Keh! Now I'm even more confused!"

_'What's his problem now? I tried to be as tactful and gentle as possible. I made it plain as day that I love him and in our relationship, we don't need the common concept of trust. It transcends that juvenile notion. He's being a total jerk!'_

She didn't understand that a male's thinking is not quite so global, but more streamlined to aid in the focus required for the harsh realities of survival and protection of what is his. It would take time; time for reflection and a chance to focus on this one new riddle. He really didn’t get it and that was pissing him off.

"Don't take that tone of voice with me, mister! Okay, so you want me to say I trust you? I trust you! Are you happy now? Uuuuuugh! Inuyasha! You really test my patience sometimes!" yelled Kagome, rising to her feet, clenching her fists, knowing she didn't mean a word she said about trusting him, at least by his definition.

Inuyasha glanced back with a glare and slightly laid his ears against his head.

"Don't you dare, bitch!" he snarled, rising and turning to face her.

_'Damn she's gorgeous when she's angry. Her face is the color of my kimono,'_ thought Inuyasha, already aroused from their previous activity constantly reminded of the steamy flush of her skin when they made love; such an odd moment to feel the heat of desire rising within him. It was thoroughly distracting.

Kagome narrowed her eyes, raised her hand, and drew back to slap him good and hard. _'Call me bitch like that! I don't think so. I am so sick of that!'_

"Don't even think about it, wench," he growled seductively low and deep then grabbed her forearm.

"Uuuuuh!" Her anger getting the better of her, she raised the other hand and clenched her jaw. “Don’t call me a bitch!” she hissed through clenched teeth.

He grabbed the other arm and tucked them both behind her back then held them fast by the wrist with one hand while crushing her to him with his other arm. Kagome narrowed her eyes when he chuckled, only to widen them when he swooped down and crashed his lips into hers. His large, clawed hand rose up behind her head to press her mouth to his and held her in place while he nearly bruised her lips as he ferociously devoured her. He demanded her participation by drawing her tongue into his mouth. Kagome whimpered as he tugged at her bottom lip and nipped it lightly with his fangs, drawing a droplet of blood.

_'I'm not going to let him get away with this! First he wants to be a total jerk and then expects me to...to…’_

“Mmm,” she moaned, nipping him back, only harder because her eye teeth were not so sharp.

"You need to sharpen those fangs of yours," he gasped.

"The first chance I get," she rasped. The heat of her anger was swiftly being lost to the heat of another kind.

Inuyasha let go of her wrists to take hold of her shoulders. His large hands completely cupped her shoulder blades. Kagome tangled her small slender fingers into his silvery white, silky mane as he pushed her to the ground and ground his arousal into that very sensitive area between her thighs. Leaning into her, his heated breath warmed her ear as he demanded with a whisper,

"Say you trust me to give you pleasure. Say it now."

She hated that word. Trust. She had learned the hard way that "trust" made her give up her self-reliance, her independence, made her vulnerable to heartbreak. And, she knew that he didn’t just want her to say that she trusted him to give her pleasure, but that she trusted him implicitly in all things.

"Do it now, Kagome!" growled Inuyasha, his blazing golden eyes penetrating her soul. "Say you trust me."

She felt his need for reassurance of her devotion to him and could not help but fill the empty years of loneliness and rejection instilled in him. Melting her heart and her body for him, painfully ridding herself of her last bastion of defense, and submitting to his need, she whispered barely audibly, 

“I trust you, Inuyasha." 

Inuyasha's gaze softened. _'She really meant it.'_

His heart swelled, the pit of his stomach warmed throwing flames of desire through his blood. Brushing his cheek against hers, he nibbled her earlobe and slowly, tenderly, licked the soft smooth skin behind, impressing upon her his appreciation of what she had overcome in order to give him what he needed. She turned her head to bare her neck in want of more. 

Nipping and sucking his way down her neck, he paused at his mark. He rubbed the tip of his nose around it and reveled in the scent of his claim. When he ever so slowly ran his tongue around the punctures, his heated breath scorching the wound, Kagome shivered uncontrollably at the tingling that raced all over her body. She turned into his silky hair, cool against her face, and sought the warmth beneath as she felt slick wet heat invade her thighs. Reaching up through his hair, she caressed the silk covered puppy-dog ears. He purred a deep rumbling growl as the flames within turned into a bonfire of passion. Bringing his lips to hers, he plunged his tongue into her mouth exploring her depths, breathing her breath, relishing her trembling body beneath him.

She clenched his ears in her tiny hands, mewling into his mouth, causing it to tingle, driving him insane. The animal within him wanted to ravage her, take her wild and rough. But, he had pushed her beyond her boundaries with the promise of pleasure and he would give it to her, more than she could imagine.

"I will make you call out my name three times before I'm through with you," he murmured into her ear before nipping it.

"One down, two to go," she panted, quivering when he nipped at her earlobe.

"Four times then!" he declared.

Kagome gasped in surprise and pleasure when Inuyasha quickly rose to straddle her and then clawed her blouse to shred, exposing her firm breasts that were not too large and not too small, perfectly balanced with the size of her hips. His golden irises, glowing steam in the darkness, roamed the contours of her heavenly body. 

When he grabbed her nipples tugging and rolling them between his thumbs and index fingers, her blood burned within her breasts. Just before throwing her head back to let out a small soft scream while lifting him with her hips, she observed his look of determination.

_'She's perfect...and she's mine,'_ he thought, cupping her breasts and lightly squeezing them before leaning down to take her left nipple into his mouth.

Kagome closed her eyes and blocked out all perception except for the hot, wet mouth trading off teasing each nipple, suckling them while pulling away. All the while, Inuyasha passed the tip of his tongue back and forth across them, only to dive down and repeat the motion, driving her arousal higher each time. Inuyasha drew back and observed, pleased that his ministrations had caused her nipples to swell in anticipation of more. 

“Please, Inuyasha,” she moaned, rearing her hips and raising his body. _‘I never, in my life, imagined anything like this. How does he know what to do?’_

He grinned at her response as she lifted her breasts to him, her eyes hooded and face blushed crimson. His eyes drank in the sight of her smooth, baby soft, porcelain white skin. He cupped her breasts, gently pushing them together then buried his face between the luscious mounds. His slick warm wet tongue slid between her breasts before he kissed them then drew her delicate skin into his mouth.

_‘I think I like the effect this is having on her,’_ he grinned and retraced all he had just done to her, occasionally caressing her collar bone with his lips and tongue.

Spasms of pleasure shook her. She writhed beneath him, her body tensing. He realized, a bit surprised, that this lone provocation was actually bringing her to the verge of ecstasy. Pushing his legs back, he moved from his straddling position and spread her legs with his knee. Kagome mewled as he gave her his weight. Grabbing his shoulders, she lifted her hips into his waist while he continued to torture her.

“I want you, Inuyasha...inside of me.” She struggled to reach her skirt and pull it down.

Inuyasha pushed her hands away and slid one hand beneath her skirt and panties, careful of his claws, and noticed the coiled stiffness of her abdomen. 

“Nnnnng,” he half groaned, half growled, with her, feeling her readiness for him as his fingers skimmed the surface of her dew laden lips.

_‘Gods, I want her so bad! But…I have to see...’_

He renewed his onslaught of her breasts while he tentatively slid two fingers to her entrance and applied pressure to her small mound. When she rocked her hips up to him, the tips of his fingers slightly entered her dew-slicked passage. Her walls quivered and she nearly bucked him off when he simultaneously slid his to fingers into her wanton body while tugging at her nipples. He grinned at the feel of fingernails digging into his shoulders and began to ravage her with renewed vigor.

His fingers filled her aching passage, plunging into the very core of her desire for release. She wanted more, more of him. She loved her hanyou so much it hurt. Being one with him was all her heart desired.

_‘I can’t...take it anymore,’_ she thought as he brought to the height of ecstasy.

“Inuyasha!” Wave after wave of pure ecstasy coursed through her. Her hands fisted into his hair and dragged his face down between her breasts.

Inuyasha could barely breathe as she convulsed against his body. He continued tightly cupping her mound, his fingers still inside of her, head on her chest, as her convulsions slowly died away. His arousal throbbed in need as he imagined her pulsating walls clenched around his shaft instead of his fingers. 

She shuddered when he withdrew his fingers, tried to catch her breath, and was thankful when he lifted his body to rise up over her. Her eyes closed, she could feel his hair tickle her shoulders and cheeks. Once again, waves of ecstasy washed over her at the tender touch of his tongue tracing the curve of her lips before gently dipping into her warm recesses. 

“I love you, Kagome,” whispered Inuyasha, his jagged breath fanning down across her face.

“I love you too, Inuyasha,” she rasped, reaching up to caress his silver-haired velvety ears.

_‘Two down, two to go,’_ he thought to himself, purring as he pressed his delicate, sensitive ears into her tiny, soft hands.

~*~*~*~*~*~

 

**_*Disclaimer*_ **

Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru.

~*~


	11. Salvation Comes in Two or More

Inuyasha was not about to give Kagome the chance to lose the blush he had worked so hard to accomplish in her. Although, it was tempting to continue lying still next to her, enjoying the erotic feeling of her soft, supple hands toying with the ever so sensitive thin flaps of his ears. However, he was not finished pleasing his Kagome. He was not finished loving her, was not finished worshipping her, thanking her for her devotion, her love. How she could still love him after all the torment he had put her through was beyond him.

Distraction from his ears had to be the first step. With the dew cultivated by his previous handiwork, Kagome’s body shimmered in the moonlight, and he took advantage of it. The palm of his hand easily glided across her collarbone, then her breasts, flirting with them before tenderly journeying down to her abdomen. He lifted himself from her side to hover above her, enveloping them in the shiny, silver veil of his thick mane. For a moment, he became lost in the allure of her dark chocolate eyes. Sinking into those depths sent an intense flood of emotions through his heart, hurling it against the wall of his chest.

_‘How can love hurt?’_

His slightest touch, even accidental, had always excited her. She knew that it was because she loved him so very much. But, that was the way it is supposed to be, wasn’t it? His touch, just a simple touch, could start a smoldering fire. In the past, she had to bury it, throw water on the flames. Now, with no hesitation, she could let it burn into a bonfire of passion.   
His hands, skimming along her bare skin, sent sparks flitting over every inch of her body. She dropped her hands from his delicate ears, palms up next to her shoulders, and sucked in a jagged breath. Suddenly, he was above her, his musky breath fanning its heat across her face, burning right into her heart, his brilliant, golden, hanyou eyes, glowing with desperate hunger, hunger for her. His eyes seemed to swallow her as he moved closer. She closed her eyes as a silent shower of butterfly kisses cascaded down upon her face. Barely audible whispers of affection and love bathed her ears. Tantalizing, barely tangible kiss all too quickly brushed past her lips. It was not enough.   
Inuyasha caught his breath as she tangled her hands in his hair, pulled him down, and ravaged his lips. With her tongue, she coaxed him to open his mouth, at which point, he plunged in, plumbing her depths. Fire raged through his veins, demanding he take her. Kagome moaned into his mouth, writhing beneath him, beckoning him to become one with her.

_’No, no, not yet!’_ He tried to drive his primitive urge into submission.

Tearing his lips from hers, his hands and fingers played along her body, his lips, tongue, and fangs along her neck, drawing seductive whines and mewls from her. Her salty dew only made him eager for more. His suckling became more voracious, his fangs no longer just grazing her skin, but trailing small cuts. Her blood was driving him mad. His tongue trailed up along her jaw line, lapping the salty dew.

Pleasure and pain mingled until Kagome could no longer tell the difference. Her hands crumpled as he tangled his large clawed fingers into hers and gripped them as though they were his only hold on reality. His body, out of control, answered her writhing with bucking, and groaning, his powerful and possessive beast threatening to push her over the crest of ecstasy. 

“Inuyasha,” whimpered Kagome plaintively.

A husky voice reluctantly answered, “What, Kagome?”

“I want you, to be one with you, now, please. Join with me,” she pleaded through halting breaths.

Her pleas drove him, the beast was unleashed. He buried his face in her hair, taking in as much of the lavender scent as he possibly could, trying to bring himself under control. He felt the race of her pulse on his cheek as he pressed against her neck and it only caused his blood to pound harder in his veins.

“Please Inuyasha.” Her nails dug into his back.

“Oh no, Kagome,” he groaned, losing his last vestige of control.

A tremor rippled through her body as he slid back to take her. And that he did, unbridled, hard, and vicious. 

“INUYASHA!” screamed Kagome when he abruptly sheathed himself inside her, sending her soaring to heights she had never known existed.

Even through his own passion, he felt her walls gripping his pulsing shaft in rippling waves as her nails dug trails from his shoulders, down his back, and across his ribs. He forced himself to remain still, giving her his body to use as an instrument for her completion as she writhed beneath him. Once her pulse began to slow against his cheek, he began moving inside of her, rocking his body against her as he suckled her ear.

“Kagome…” he rasped, “My Kagome.” His hot breath teased her ear, fanning the flames already licking her cheeks.

Kagome felt as though she was about to break. She pulled her arms up and wrapped them around his shoulders, throwing her head back.

“Inuyasha, enough!” she cried out, pulling his head up, gazing up through steaming fog to encounter pink-tinted hanyou eyes.  
Inuyasha leaned down and plundered her lips, taking from her what he had given. Rising to stare down at his mate, everything else around him disappeared and he unleashed his desire for her, allowing it free reign.

“Kagome,” rasped the hanyou. Now, more demon than human, he lowered his forehead to hers as his body jolted in waves of rapture.

“Inuyasha!” she screamed, her body taking wing once again, not to be left behind by her lover. She wound her fingers into his hair, pulling him further into her body.  
Hearts pounded, pulses raced, breath became labored. Aftershocks tore through her body as he made small rocking motions just for her pleasure.

Kagome was beyond spent as Inuyasha’s body trembled against her flesh; not only from his completion, but from the effort involved. Gently, he withdrew from Kagome, the sensation of his slick shaft, gliding along her walls, sending more convulsions through her. He fell to the ground at her side and tried to catch his breath.

A few minutes later, Inuyasha rolled to cuddle Kagome’s side. “Kagome?”

“Mmm,” she moaned, eyes still closed.

“Look at me.” Her eyes lazily opened to gaze into deep pools of need, desire love, and pain, all intermingled.

“Kagome, you have taken my life; the pain, the misery, and turned it into light, laughter, and love. You have offered me salvation. I don’t know what I would do without you,” Inuyasha murmured, overwhelmed by the generosity of the fates.

“You never have to ponder that question. I will always be by your side,” she promised while gently stroking his cheek and hoping to one day take away, as she was able, the pain from his dark past. She tenderly kissed his lips. Withdrawing, she saw the shimmer of moonlight reflecting from the silent tears that were trickling down his cheeks.

“Oh, Inuyasha,” she murmured and tugged him into a fierce embrace. “I’ll always, always be here with you.”  
Inuyasha gathered her to him, wrapping both his arms and his legs around her body, and held her as though he would never let her go.

They held on to one another as though this were an illusion they would wake from at any moment.

~*~

“Hold still, Inuyasha!”

“Feh! I’ve been laying here for twenty minutes! I’m bored!”

“But I want to get it perfect,” complained Kagome.

“I am already perfect,” Inuyasha gave her a wicked grin, “alive and in the flesh.”

He began crawling toward her like a tiger stalking its prey.

“Inuyasha, stop it,” giggled Kagome as he mock growled.

He bared his fangs and raised his hands, curling his fingers and claws toward her. Kagome let out a playful shriek. The colored pencils and sketchpad fell to the ground as she jumped and ran with Inuyasha right behind her.

“Sango! Miroku! Help! A demon is after me!” laughed Kagome as she ran.

“No one can hear you little girl,” growled the grinning hanyou. For a few moments, allowed her to stay a few paces ahead. 

“Grrrrr.” 

He pounced.

Laughter filled Inuyasha’s forest that day, and for many days ahead.

~*~*~*~*~*~

**_*Disclaimer*_**

Inuyasha and all associated characters are owned by Rumiko Takahashi, Shogakukan, Yomiuri TV, Sunrise, and Viz. I make no profit from this story, nor do I intend to. My only goal is to occupy my demented mind with delusions of actually owning a life-sized, anatomically correct Sesshoumaru. ^_^

 

~*~*~*~*~*~


End file.
